"Losing It With Jesus"

Yes dearest friends.

The Lord has BEEN convicting me for the longest time ever to get my act together, start eating right and exercising on a regular basis.

Old stubborn me said: Why bother? I look good, I can fit into MOST dresses and I stiiiiillll attract attention from men (albeit the wrong kind) soooo why bother to change myself? Isn't the goal to love myself even if I don't like what I see in the mirror?

Note to self: you cannot change what you have not yet accepted as is.


Enter the Holy Spirit: "Your body is on lease to you for a short time, when you give it back to the Lord, what will He see? That you took good care of it or treated it like garbage and filled it with garbage?"

"Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much." Luke 16:10 (NIV)"
  
CONVICTION

I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I have been given this body as a gift and as a the vehicle by which I can do God's work. It is my duty to take care of it, and be good to it and treat it well; after all, this is the temple in which the Lord lives in. If I can not take care of what little it takes to care of my body then how can He entrust me with taking care of other more difficult tasks?

CLEAN SWEEP

If I am a vessel for the Lord, how can He use me if I'm not willing to do the work required to be just that?
It simply isn't wise for someone in the profession of running around after children to be overweight and lethargic- what message does that send to children?

SO:
I prayed and the Lord answered within an hour. A sister from church posted a tweet about her experience with being trained by one of our brothers in Christ.

LIGHT BULB MOMENT

Fast forward to later on this past week to me signing a 20-session contract for personal training with Steven Bell from Soldier Bell Fitness ( his own business).

 How blessed am I to go to the same church as my personal fitness trainer?  Blessed and highly favored is the correct answer.

Lord, you are so good to me :)

The funniest part is that I had never intended to become a part of Bibleway Ministries (our church) in the first place.

I asked the Lord to place me in whichever church He wanted me to be in where I could serve Him best and that is where He led me....I'm beginning to see why.

So this past week has really been about me getting my diet in order; being conscious of the amount of fruits, veggies, proteins, grains and water I consume throughout the day.

INTERESTING FACT: If you look throughout the Bible, and think of the time that Jesus lived in, He would most likely have been following a "Mediterranean diet" which is mainly fish, grains and veggies

Since I don't eat meat anymore this has been really challenging in terms of finding protein substitutes that I'm not familiar with- beans for one -_-


BUT NO FEAR!

Apparently there is a way to prepare and cook beans in a way so that they don't give you gas; I will post the details in a later blog.

 To conclude, I'm thankful for the Lord's goodness to me, his patience, and most of all his love for me.

I'm still trying to understand what a daughter really means to a father and He is showing me DAILY what that means and it's healing my heart in places I didn't even know needed healing.

We really do serve a mighty God *amin*

Thank you for your staying on this journey with me fellow readers.

I appreciate it and may God bless you xox

-Mbula Enobong,
daughter of THE King

A Letter To Myself

Dear friends,

Forgive me for being away for so long but the last two months have been quite life-changing.

To begin with:

I am now back in school to complete my Early Childhood Education diploma (where the Lord wants me next, I have yet to confirm, but I have an inkling that it just might be Carleton University to pursue my Bachelor of Social Work)

This was quite an interesting decision to have to make so abruptly and so soon. I was originally going to complete my diploma starting this spring but in the evening. However, the Lord had something else in mind and wanted me to complete it during the day. Hopefully, this will speed up the process for me to also complete my final placement in a daycare center, hence allowing me to complete and get my E.C.E Diploma

NEWS FLASH: I used to hate having to type up my blog on my laptop because my mouse would always somehow manage to highlight all the wonderful things I had written...and they would automatically delete as I would continue to type the 5th paragraph I was already on. But Hallelujiah, thank you Jesus, I found the lovely little contraption on my laptop that renders your laptop mouse inactive while you type. Whoever invented this, GOD BLESS YOU


Now continuing:

Hummm....

I have been struggling for quite some time with understanding the concept of self-love and self-respect. I now know that all my `self-esteem` issues stem from the lack of a father figure in my household while I grew up into a young girl then later on into a young woman.


Here I am now and I am ready and willing to learn from the Lord.

It started with Him leading me to a website called "The Daily Love" ...and though there are some writers that I would call "hippie", I value some of the points the writers make about loving yourself.

Loving yourself is a continuous art that we must all strive to work at.

Why? Because when you love yourself and are therefore OVERFLOWING with love, it is then easier to do the Lord's work WITH and IN love.

(Hallelujia, thank you Jesus)


SO:


I wrote this little love letter to myself after a nasty fight with my mom that actually began the steps to healing and humbling me.

"Dear Mbula darling,

Yes, tonight's fight was the beginning of something beautiful: YOURSELF

I know you're tired of always standing up for yourself against your mother but YOU ARE WORTH THE FIGHT. YOU ARE AMAZING WONDERFULLY AND FEARFULLY MADE.

Trust in the Lord and He will help you humble yourself and honor your mother and father.
There is work to be done. I know there will be days where you don't "feel" like doing it and putting work & energy into your relationship but decide this; YOU WILL NOT GIVE UP ON HER!
She is also worth the fight.
You cannot move out unless it's perfectly setup.
I don't want you to wear a mask on the outside and be ugly behind closed doors.
I don't want you growing up thinking you can't develop meaningful relationships, bonds & conections with your children.
I know you think she doesn't care, but she does, in her own little kamba woman way <3
You can't change her, but you can change the depth & meaningfulnes of your relationship
When the Lord said let the dead bury their dead, it was for you. Show the Lord where you have buried this relationship and ou will see him bring it to life and loosen the bonds!"


Wow....


Reading all that now...It's actually quite prophetic. I showed where I had buried the hatchet, the axe, the chainsaw, the matches and the knife...and guess what? He turned all those weapons into tools.

My mother and I have some ways to go....but the process has just begun and I know the Lord won't give up on us until the good works that he started in us, is complete.

Today I am thankful for the opportunity to serve such a loyal, faithful and understanding God.

THERE IS NONE LIKE HIM: FACT

Mother's day is right around the corner and I really don't know what my mom would like except maybe for me to clean this house and cook her a nice meal...I'm thinking of getting her perfume instead LOL #Godhelpme

There's more I would like to write but it will have to wait until another day.

In the meantime,

God bless you all and keep you safe

xoxo

-MBULA ENOBONG

"All About the Kingdom"

Hmmm....

What to write, what to write.

Matthew 6:33 "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you"

The Lord called something to my attention today- I'm always making it about ME.

ME ME ME ME ME

ME ME ME ME ME

Lord, what can you do for ME today?

Lord, how can you give ME wisdom today?

Lord, when will you bless ME in my day today'?

Lord, can you help MEEEEE with MYYY plans for the future?

Lord, can you help ME lose MY weight?

Lord, can you help ME with MY finances and MY bank account?

Lord, can you help ME with MY hair and MY sense of fashion

Lord, can you help ME with MY boy issues?

Honestly, this one-way selfish conversation could go on for DAYS

The point that the Lord was showing me is that He didn't create me for my own pleasure- He created me for HIS pleasure and HIS alone.

So when I do anything and everything that goes against pleasing Him, things WILL go haywire.

If I do what He is calling me TO DO, He will take care of EVERYTHING else. Job, car, money, boytoy, mom, hair,clothes name it HE WILL TAKE CARE OF IT.

RESOLUTION: DO YOUR JOB AND GET BACK INTO GOD'S WILL FOR YOUR LIFE.

It may not be glamorous, it may not be the high life you were dreaming of, but the 'things' and 'status'  but who you have by you side will decide whether the fame you gain will wither away and you will be easily forgotten or if you will be memorable for generations to come.

Living a life for God is worth more than any status or 5min or fame you will ever get because the reward is...ETERNAL, yes I said it EEEETTTEERRRNAALLLL

Ok folks- so let's get it together, snap out of it, stop sucking our thumbs (as pastor would say) and GET OVER IT.

It's not about YOU.

You can't see the big picture right now, and THAT'S OKAY!

TRUST IN GOD, RESPECT HIM AND OBEY HIM DAILY

Stop whining about what so and so did to you, how you were beat up in the fifth grade, how your mommy almost killed you.

YOU'RE STILL HERE

WHY?

BECAUSE GOD HAS A PURPOSE AND A CALLING FOR YOUR LIFE.

If you don't know, now you know...and if you still need to know, ask the man upstairs Himself.


That is all...GOOD NIGHT! xo

The Morning After

Woke up feeling sick and it went right down to my soul
This was last night`s aftermath, where my friend was the toilet bowl.
I had hugged it nice and tight and spilled out my darkest secrets.
And after I was done, it was enough to give you jeepers creepers
Just to see the mess I made and the bed in which I had laid.
This is the story of a girl,
who didn't cry a river and drown the whole world with tears,
But instead she silenced it with her fears.

Then came a hero, in a white and shining armor.
He filled her with joy and promised never to harm her.
You can tell from her smile that she's come quite far
And if you compared His love with others you will see they are all sub-par
Jesus Christ is Lord,
Need I say more?

Patience during\after prayer

Dearest friends,

I've been mulling over this concept for awhile and I think it's something the Lord would like me to share with you.

I work at a dispatch call center and in essence we deal with clients that need us to either turn up or turn down the heat, fix a toilet, mop an area, fix a door, change light bulbs...the list goes on.

NOW

This job can get pretty mundane and routine if you don't find a way to keep yourself busy or sane ( reading, sudoku, crosswords,) but overall, it's a great opportunity to learn how to multitask.

BUT HERE'S THE THING

Some calls\complaints MAINLY come from either one specific building, and if it's one specific building, there's usually a regular client that is calling to complain.

Here's what I've learned about how this co-relates with prayer:

When you ask the Lord for something, He's already working on it!

The Bible says that He already knows what you have need of! So it doesn't discredit your prayer or your request.

However, I noticed some clients will make a request and 15 minutes later, call in again to ask why the work hasn't been done yet.

Mind you in the span of that 15 minutes, we have either probably spoken to the technician/cleaner/building manager about the issue and SOMEONE IS ON THEIR WAY.

SO:

In the same way, please know that after you have prayed, HELP IS ON THE WAY.

Now, it doesn't mean go ahead and try and fix the problem by yourself while waiting * I do this alot *

Or that you should stop praying about it if you don't see results right away.

KEEP Praying Until Something Happens

PRAISE AND PUSH, PRAISE AND PUSH ,PRAISE AND PUSH PRAISE AND PUSH& PRAISE

Honestly, waiting is the best time to be praising and worshiping Him for answering your prayer(s)

So make the best of it!

That is all

#goodnight

Adventures In Trusting God (PART II)

So we check into our hotel, pack away our clothes and just relax in our hotel suite. Did we mention that it had a kitchenette, dining room, cutlery, cooking and dining utensils.

...

Oh yeah...

We forgot to mention how we got to our hotel...

Well...by cab.

 OH YOU MEANT BEFORE THAT...?

at the Greyhound station in Rochester?

OHHHH WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY BEFORE THAT?

at the Greyhound station in Buffalo...

OHHHHH YYOUU MEAN EVEN MOOOORE BACK THAN THAT?

At the US Customs border?

Oh yeah that.

As Mbula was flirting up a storm with Officer M and I was sending up prayers, another officer stepped into the picture and looked over Officer M's shoulder as he reviewed, inspected, double checked and scanned our passports.

RASSSS...

Folks,

There was literally a PAUSE where Mr. M looked at me and I KNEW HE KNEW THAT I KNEW THAT THE PASSPORT HE WAS HOLDING WAS EXPIRED.

I was sure he was going to say something at that moment. I was literally watching his lips.

Why he only chose to say "So Mbula, how long will you be in New York for?"  we will never know.

He didn't even ask for the plethora of documents that I had stashed and prepared for this exact moment.

I was ready to prove my citizenship, birth certificate, place of residence, place of education, bills with current and former address... A WHOLE PORTFOLIO OF PREPARATION... AND NONE OF IT WAS NEEDED.

*claps hands*

THANK YOU JESUS

--) Before we continue we just need to take a moment and thank Jesus

Thank you:

For laying it in Jessica's spirit the desire to be in your presence this weekend

For allowing all of the arrangements to be financially possible

For showing us how to trust in you

For showing us the key to doing your perfect will

For allowing us to be free in the spirit

For allowing us to be in your presence

For helping us to step into a new year with a new understanding and appreciation for the intimacy we now have with you.

For bring us onto a NEXT a level

For teaching us that prayer and praise WORKS

For showing us that you will always make a way for those whose hearts are set apart for you.

Fast forward to getting back on the bus, our 2hr wait in Buffalo (Uhm never again), to our arrival in Rochester.

Can we just talk about how COLD IT WAS? RAWTID...

And on top of that, a certain conductor of the Greyhound bus (Buffalo to Rochester) by the name of JAMES, approached our cab window (Mbula's side to be exact), who then proceeded to POUND his fist against the cab window. As the window rolled down and Mr. James introduced himself 

And I quote:

Him: Hi, I'm James. What's your name (as he looked in and stared at me expectantly and creepily)

Me: Jessica

Him to Mbula: Give this to her. This is my number. Call me anytime.

Mbula's thinking: when the RASSS did I become Jessica's personal secretary to be takin' mens numbers that are chopping her ?

So we're in the cabbie spelling our hotel address (a good 4 mins) for our INCOHERENT cab driver. Lets just say our efforts to understand each other was all in vain, as he turned off the GPS claiming to know EXACTLY where he's going...*Biggest sigh ever*

He knows where he's going alright....to another city! Henrietta to be exact.....We end up in the outskirts of Rochester @ 4:40am! After our slight indifferences with our cab driver and outbursts of frustration, we arrive at our hotel...in Greece! (about 20 mins from Downtown Rochester).

The hotel looked interesting as it was kinda in the middle of nowhere but had all the luxury anyone could want including kitchenette, dining room, cutlery, cooking and dining utensils as we mentionned above..

How about we tell you, we woke up BRIGHHHHT and perky @ 10:30am...only to find out we had missed the 1st service of the day! LAWDDDDD...

We're in Greece! Lets..............................UHMMM........ What DO people do out here...?

Mbula indecisively shifts her focus on getting her hair done to getting our nails done.....NONE OF WHICH HAPPENED...SHAME!

All in the same, we decide to get some food....sleep....and wake up in time for our service at 6:30pm.

Let me tell you from NOW.....Greece does not have a Pizza Pizza, Popeyes does not deliver and Chinese food is questionable....(As always)...But aye....Pizza Hut is familiar to us Canadians so we order our presumably delicious large vegetarian pizza, cheese sticks and soda.


PAUSE:
 Tell me why this so called large vegetarian pizza, from the looks of it, turns out to be LAST NIGHT`S pizza, just reheated. The crust, cheese, tomatoes and greens all looked DRY!!


Clearly Jessie's stomach was not 'down' with that and decided to tell Jessica what was 'up'  - true story

NEVER AGAIN


Fast forward to AFTER the service where Jessie was able to link up with our friend R.C (who 'happened' to be staying at the hotel across from where the service was being held) and spend time in fellowship

GOD IS GOOD

NO COINCIDENCES THERE


Then our 'designated' cabbie, came and picked us up from the hotel and drove us home.

SIDENOTE:

Our cabby was a very interesting character. On our first ride for the evening service, he drove us through some  boricuan gueto (puerto-rican ghetto neighborhood)  Honestly it was just awkward. He said he would give us a tour, not the opportunity to put our lives in danger yeesh!

 And as we conversed with him he kept mentioning how when he visited Toronto he liked to visit the show girls and the strip clubs.
.... I'm sorry, were we supposed to say to him: yeah next time you visit we'll tag along and even show you a couple of our spots?

Then apparently when we went to withdrawl money, he asked Jess if we were lovers :| Really though?

 Then after Saturday night's service when he came and picked us up from the hotel (mind you it was almost 2am), he asked us if we had been in the room with somebody :o  I thinking: grandpa,you don't know me like that! If you think we're the kind of Christian girls that just 'act' Christian but are REALLY down low then you got another think comin!

Fast forward to Sunday morning service where we came in a bit late for worship but still caught the word. The message was calling us to chose who we would serve- God or the world.


After service we went to a grill restaurant ( I forget the name but they were PACKED) So we ordered the food to go.

I ordered a fish platter and Jess got some goooood chicken.

Sunday was my turn to have a churning belly that was disagreeing with the food.

Fast forward to us just sitting on our hotel bed, reminiscing and thanking the Lord for such a wonderful laid out experience

WE WANT MORE OF YOU JESUS

MORE EXPERIENCES LIKE THIS

TO SEE YOUR HAND MAKING ALL THINGS COME TOGETHER FOR GOOD AND FOR YOUR GLORY ALONE

Then we decided we would catch the midnight greyhound so we could well be back in Toronto by Monday afternoon and perhaps even on our way to Ottawa.

And indeed it was so.

I'm sorry if I've cut out so much of our experience in Rochester but needless to say, WE SERVE A GREAT BIG GOD THAT DOES NOT HAVE THE WORD IMPOSSIBLE IN HIS DICTIONARY OR VOCABULARY.

We learned that the key to getting in God's will for your life is to TRUST Him in all things and at all times.

proverbs 3:5-6

He taught us that as long as we keep praying, praising and steadfastly focusing on Him, He will do the rest.

He taught us that if He brings us to it, He will bring us through it.

The key to this whole weekend was that in our heart of hearts, he KNEW and SAW that we were seeking nothing but to be in His presence, not to receive some kind of blessing or healing, no JUST to be SOAKED in His presence was all we asked, and He honored it and went above and beyond to make our wildest dream come true.

Trust in Him my friends, whether it's a minute detail or the goriest most horrific thing that could happen to you in your life.

Let's leave it at daddy's feet and say " Honestly, I donno what to do about this" or " I can't seem to get up when I fall over this block"

No daddy can ever compare to this ONE. So take his hand, it's always outstretched, ready and willing to help you get up onto your feet.

He is so good.

We love you daddy Jesus xo <3

PAGE BREAK!

Ladies and gents,

Sorry for the delay for Part II, but we figure the climax build-up is totally worth it for you guys :)

In the meantime, I would like to testify and briefly say "Thank You Jesus"

Anyone who knew me last year at my worst knows that I ended up being hospitalized after
an anxiety attack\mental breakdown.

Not only was there a change happening physically, but spiritually, there was a spirit that was seeing it's way out of my life.

I could go on and give your the gritty details, but we shall leave that for a coffee date.

For now,

I just want to thank the Lord. Since my breakdown, it has been an uphill battle of crucifying flesh, letting go of people and letting go of old ways and STILL there is more to do as I grow in him and He grows in me.
I want to thank Him for giving me :

->Mental clarity, focus and awareness.
->peace that surpasses all understanding
->time
->compassion

but most of all...

HELPING ME UNDERSTAND WHAT TRUE LOVE IS REALLY ALL ABOUT

I am daily learning this, daily getting deeper...and I'm just honored that He would even consider me a candidate to work with Him to complete His work\plans.

He is good.

He is loving.

He is kind

and get this...


HE IS A GENTLEMAN :)

So ladies and gents,

let me leave you with this:

Don't give up! I know the storm is raging outside and you can't even look up to cry out to the heavens or even complete your prayer because you're so lost in what's going on but I've got something to tell you.

HE'S ALREADY FIXED IT.

HE'S ALREADY GOT YOU COVERED/PROTECTED

So, be still, and know that He is God and HE is in control.

On the real though, aren't you glad that it's someone like HIM that's in control and not someone like Lucifer?

I thank GOD! LOL

Good night and God bless you all xo

-Mbula Enobong